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Inconsiderate Travellers #35: The Delayed Editioninconsiderate traveller

Yeah, so, this picture was taken a while ago...a long while ago. It was taken on my last trip back to Wales where I somehow made all my connections and didn't run into any delays or meteorological disasters.

That sort of situation usually leads to one of two scenarios:

1. I become totally laid back and relaxed and let the seemingly perfect journey carry me along on it's gold coated tracks.

or

2. My Inconsiderate Travellers awareness gets heightened and I zero in on any and all dodgy people to see if they commit an act of pure selfishness.

In this case it was a young gentleman who (bless him) was 5'4" maybe 5'5" at the most. Naturally, being a borderline dwarf, he could only just reach high enough to put his bags in the overhead compartment.

I guess the potential embarrassment of having people in the carriage realise he was tiny was enough to stop him from even attempting this feat of physical endurance, so he lumped for putting his man bag next to him on the window seat.

After that he just buried his head in his iPhone (which looked giant in his child like hands) and sipped on his Red Bull like it was Courvoisier.

Red Bull might give you wings but it apparently doesn't give you energy enough to put your bag in the overhead storage bay where it's supposed to go. Fuck you Red Bull drinking dwarf boy.

@WhyAllTheAnger

 

Inconsiderate Travellers #34: The Back To Basics Editioninconsiderate traveller henry kissinger

As much as moving on with your life is healthy every now and then it's good to return to what you know. There's a certain comfort in the familiar, that's probably why Superman always goes back to Smallville or why John Favreau goes from fat to thin and then back to being fat again.

That's also why I'm glad this happened. Inconsiderate Travellers can sometimes drive me insane (or fill me glee as I take a picture of the annoyance) because seeing yet another different type of person putting their luggage's comfort over that of a fellow human being used to make me feel every negative emotion there is.

Fortunately this time I wasn't angry or frustrated, I was comforted by the return of the old classic; middle aged woman puts her luggage on the window seat and sits in the aisle seat so that she doesn't have to sit next to someone.

Amazing. It made me realise that there's nothing I can do to stop this from happening, so I might as well sit back and enjoy it.

Just knowing that this is proof that the human species will never evolve beyond putting their own selfish desires before the needs of others now makes me happy because I'm documenting it. I'm exactly the same as famous historical diary keepers like Samuel Pepys, Anne Frank and that serial killer from Se7en.

Once again I feel I have to acknowledge the help of The Floating Head of Henry Kissingercopyright for protecting this woman's identity (and for not suing me for using his image in this feature).

It's hard to tell what's going on here but as memory serves the lady in question was slowly eating a handful of tiny Smurfs as she watched old footage of the siege of the Iranian Embassy on her iPad...or maybe not I can't remember, I was on a sugar high at the time.

@WhyAllTheAnger

 

I think I'd rather walk thank youscary-plane-evil-aeroplane-funny

As you may have gathered from some of the more elaborate and rage filled posts on here I've become something of a weary traveller over the years.

Whether it's having to put up with the UK's substandard and overpriced public transport system or suffering through road rage attacks on our inadequate highways, the story is pretty much always the same.

I've basically given up on any form of transportation that requires me to use anything other than my legs.

That being said air travel is slightly more bearable because most of the major airports are filled with book shops and places to eat.

There are limits to the enjoyment to be had though; the fear of a fiery death, for example, is enough to make even the most manly of Chuck Norris wannabes fall to their knees and pray to every deity known to mankind (and probably Superman) for a parachute or at least a clean pair of trousers. I would imagine this next flight might inspire that kind of reaction before the flying tin can has even left the tarmac.

Would you board flight 666 to HEL on Friday the 13th?

For superstitious travellers, that might be tempting fate. But Finnair passengers on AY666 to Helsinki - which has the three letter designation HEL - don't seem too bothered. Friday's flight is almost full.

"It has been quite a joke among the pilots," said veteran Finnair pilot Juha-Pekka Keidasto, who will fly the Airbus A320 from Copenhagen to Helsinki. "I'm not a superstitious man. It's only a coincidence for me."

The daily flight AY666 from Copenhagen to Helsinki falls on Friday the 13th twice in 2013. Friday the 13th is considered bad luck in many countries and the number 666 also has strong negative biblical associations.

Some airlines, like Scandinavian Airlines, take these fears seriously and don't have a row 13 on board. However, the negative connotations are a relatively new phenomenon for northern Europeans, and Finnair and other regional carriers like Norwegian and Estonian Air keep row 13.

"Less than 100 years ago, the number 13 did not have this sinister meaning; it's quite recent in the north," said Ulo Valk, professor of comparative folklore at the University of Tartu in Estonia.

"There are 12 hours, 12 months and in Christianity 12 apostles and this is a divine number. Add one more and it brings in a certain element of chaos," he said.

Oh please, get over yourselves people. So this particular flight happens to have a lot of spooky numbers attached to it, so what? I eat food that's months beyond it's spooky expiry date and I'm the picture of health. If you don't believe me ask that tap dancing Griffin over in the corner, he'll give you a straight answer, not like my dog, all he's interested in these days is writing his novel. All he does all day long is type, type, type poor deluded thing.

@WhyAllTheAnger

Source: MSN

 

Cock-aaaaa-to to tocockatoo-funny-meme-cute

I know it's been a while but that's because I've been working very hard, doing a lot more things with my social life and generally spending my hard earned money in a fashion that makes me more happy than when I had nothing but my ability to bitch about the world on here.

That being said I am going to try and be better at updating this site now that I'm not going to be working 8.5 days in a row (I've become indispensable you see).

So as a special treat here's one of the most popular videos doing the rounds on the internet at the moment. The fact that the guy doing the dance with this bird looks like a cross between Mr. Motivator and MC/Reverend Hammer is almost funnier than the bird dancing along with him.

Seriously, where did they find this guy? Maybe he's spent years trying to talk to animals through the medium of slightly crappy dance moves.

 

@WhyAllTheAnger

 

Because there's more to life than hyperbole, picking sides and holding your own music awards when 70% of the music on your site is pirated.
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